September 25, 2009

How to Find Love After the End of a Relationship


You can do this!

So here you are, single again and ready to recreate a life you love!

You are in transition! You are letting go of elements of your shared life while simultaneously shaping a different present and future just for you!! In your relationship, you likely made many compromises and forgot a little or a lot of who you are in the process; now is a time to reconnect and become self-aware!

This is your personal life journey, you are the author, and you have choices!

Use this time to develop the best you so when you are ready, you will share the best you in the best relationship possible!

Remember, this is a time to throw yourself into ALL things and relationships that feel good, that bring you pleasure, and that are truthfully aligned with your wants and needs! So go for it! You can join a volleyball team, a book club, and a theatre group!

Imagine pursuing ALL the things that bring you joy starting today!

You may be feeling extremely vulnerable and like you don’t have a lot to give, but this is exactly when you most need to connect with other people.

Surround yourself only with people that support you. People do not have to agree with your decisions, but they need to respect you.

This is the time to let go of old beliefs and open to challenges and growth possibilities. Face some fears and consider that the beliefs and customs you hold may no longer jive with who you have become to be in the world. It might be time to let go of all of these old definitions.

Being single is a time to explore all parts of you and embrace the individual who surfaces. Really see yourself without the shadow of another person. Sexual energy will surface—don’t hide or push it away, embrace it!

Follow these 10 steps to get back out there and create a life you love:

1 - Find an impartial confidant! Lean on your support system!
2 - Get out your dancing shoes! And a friend to go with you!
3 - Get a hobby and throw yourself into it!
4 - Get a journal and write, write, write and write!
5 – Volunteer and get involved!
6 - Get fit! Listen to and feed your body what it needs to get healthy!
7 - Develop clear and mindful boundaries!
8 - Get financially independent or at least get a plan!
9 - Rev up your sexual energy!
10 - Be gentle and loving, let go, and be harmonious in life!
You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back.” Barbara De Angelis
Open, trust and follow your heart!


Embrace Your Life!


Kelly McIntyre M.Sc.
Life Coach

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